The groomsmen are a particular part of every wedding party, but what should I expect as a groomsman anyway?
Being asked to serve as one of the groomsmen in your buddy’s wedding is a tremendous honour — but be warned that it’s also a big undertaking.
The list of groomsmen duties, while not nearly as long as that of a best man, is extensive, and there are few responsibilities on a groomsman’s to-do list that can be easily forgotten.
Before we get into all that, what are groomsmen? Officially, a groomsman is one of the groom’s male attendants in a wedding ceremony.
(FYI: If a gal getting married chooses to have a male attendant, he’d be known as a bridesman.)
So while groomsmen are well known for duties like standing beside the groom during his “I dos” and helping plan the bachelor party, it’s important to remember the lesser-known groomsmen tasks, like helping to keep the groom calm, being a model wedding guest (RSVP-ing on time, reserving travel and hotel with the room block early) and assisting with the getaway car. Here at Brighton Savoy, we have compiled an exclusive list of Wedding Photo Locations in Melbourne to help you decide on your special day.
While all might not apply to your pal’s big day, we’ve to compile the ultimate groomsman duties checklist to help you navigate the wedding and ensure your groom has the best – and most stress-free – day ever!
Who Is the Best Man?
The best man is the groom’s right-hand man throughout the planning process and on the wedding day.
The best man is typically in charge of the bachelor party and the rest of the groomsmen.
Similar to the maid of honour, the role of the best man typically comes with specific duties.
Once the best man agrees to step into this role, he’s tasked with serving as the groom’s right-hand man, lightening the groom’s load before, during, and after the wedding.
And while the best man is undoubtedly there to stand right by the groom’s side on the big day, there are a few other specific duties on his list to be aware of.
Duties of the Best Man
It’s usually a sibling or best friend, but we’ve seen other family members in that role, such as a son or father.
Of course, the items a best man may be tasked with varies from wedding to wedding, but there are a few consistent items the best man typically tackles.
The best man may be tasked with organizing the bachelor party, collecting money and purchasing a gift for the groom, and helping the groom and groomsmen pick out what they’ll be wearing to the wedding.
But their duties don’t stop there.
During the wedding, the best man traditionally holds the rings, welcomes guests to the ceremony, and makes sure the groom and groomsmen are in the right place at the right time.
Following the ceremony, the best man typically gives the first toast and makes sure guests blast throughout the reception.
It’s a vital role with many tasks, and it’s all about helping the couple in the best way possible.
Read on for the ultimate checklist of duties a best man can expect to get the full scoop and easily keep track of them all.
Pre Wedding Groomsmen Duties
Get Your Formalwear
You’re in charge of either assembling, buying or renting your wedding day attire.
The groom will (hopefully) specify the formalwear or outfit he wants you to wear, making your task of either ordering online or heading to a particular store way easier.
He might ask the best man to place one order for all of your suits and tuxedos online, in which case, all you’d have to do is send over your measurements promptly.
Knock this task out ASAP. You don’t want the best man–or worse, the groom–having to badger you to get your formalwear squared away.
Show up to Pre Wedding Events
You’re expected to attend all pre-wedding festivities, including the engagement party, couples shower, bachelor party and rehearsal dinner.
If you’re an out-of-town groomsman, don’t beat yourself up if you can’t swing multiple trips to get to every single celebration.
But if you’re in town, you should be there for the couple to raise a glass (and the roof—when appropriate).
While the best man will typically give a speech at the reception, you might be asked to say a little something at the rehearsal dinner or even the reception.
Just fair warning that a request for a groomsman toast could be coming down the pike.
Help Pick the Ring
Before the couple can “I do”, someone has to say “yes”—that means finding the perfect ring.
Future groomsmen could be asked to help with ring shopping, so if you don’t know a lot about engagement rings or proposals, just do a little research in advance so you can provide an educated opinion.
Co-Plan the Bachelor Party
Speaking of pre-wedding bashes, you should also lend the best man a hand with bachelor party plans.
The best man is often the lead organizer for this party, but give your two senses on dates, destinations, activities, restaurants and bars when asked.
The worst thing you can do is go silent in the group chat when everyone’s texting about potential plans.
You’re also responsible for paying your bachelor party bill (or splitting it evenly with the rest of the crew afterwards) and most likely paying for the groom too.
Attend the Engagement Party, Bachelor Party, and Rehearsal Dinner
Unless something significant comes up, groomsmen should attend any pre-wedding activities, excluding the bridal shower.
While one of those events may sound way more fun than the others, it’s good to show your support for the couple, from the engagement to them saying, “I do”.
Knowing the processional and recessional order, which is something you’ll learn at the ceremony rehearsal, is paramount to having a hiccup-free wedding.
Give a Thoughtful Gift
Put some thought into your wedding present for the soonly wed.
Peruse the couple’s registry to find something they’ll love—and feel free to go in on a more significant ticket item with one or the rest of the groomsmen.
You’ll have more buying power, and two heads are often better than one when it comes to gift ideas.
Book Travel and Hotel Accommodations
You’ll also need to book hotel and travel accommodations on your own.
Couples tend to book a room block in a specific hotel close to the venue, so make sure you reserve a hotel room as soon as possible.
This is especially important for destination weddings. You’ll want to be at the destination with plenty of time to participate in any wedding weekend activities.
Many people will consider waiting to book cheaper flights, but if you’re shut out, you’ll be in a bind, and the couple will be incredibly stressed at your potentially late arrival.
Avoid all that added stress and make plans as soon as you can.
Provide Emotional Support
It’s essential to offer a shoulder to lean on. Then, the best man may patiently listen to the groom’s complaints, confessions, and questions without any judgment.
He’s the reassuring best friend that every groom needs, patting the groom on the back, keeping him focused, and ensuring he has his head in the game.
Get Some Rest
You need to be on point, ready to take action on the day of the wedding, so be sure to get a good night’s rest the evening before.
Other than remembering to set your alarm, wake up on time and bring your tux to the venue, you should also be on call in the hours leading up to the ceremony—just in case the groom or best man needs anything (whether it’s a sandwich, stain remover stick or the boutonniere he left in the hotel).
Wedding Day Groomsman Duties
Be on Wedding Ceremony Duty
Time for the main event, for which you should be ready to jump in and help wherever needed.
Either the night before the wedding or the day off, help the best man and the rest of the wedding party decorate the couple’s honeymoon getaway car in style (if they’re having one).
Get to the ceremony site 30 to 45 minutes early. You might be asked to usher guests to their seats before the ceremony, so ask the couple if there are any special seating requirements.
If the couple has a traditional procession, you’ll walk down the aisle with one of the bridesmaids or maybe another female member of the family. Looking for the Best Photobooth Hires in Melbourne? We have compiled an exclusive list of some of Melbourne’s best photobooth hire suppliers to capture your special day.
If the couple has separate ushers, keep an eye on them and don’t hesitate to jump in if they look like they need backup.
Keep the Groom and Groomsmen on Schedule
Time can certainly get away from you throughout the big day, especially as the wedding party gets ready.
The best man is often tasked with keeping an eye on the clock the morning of the wedding to ensure the groom and groomsmen get to the ceremony venue on time.
He also helps to wrangle the groomsmen throughout the ceremony and makes sure they’re in the right place at the right time, organized, and presentable.
Be There for Support
This one may go without saying, but you must be there to offer the groom your love and support.
It’s a big day for the groom, filled with lots of nerves and excitement.
Don’t hesitate to hug him, squeeze on the shoulder or do a last-minute pep talk. Be sure to encourage him and remind him that he’s marrying the love of his life.
Hold the Wedding Rings
One of all essential duties, the best man, is entrusted with holding on to the wedding rings for safekeeping.
This may be the case if the couple has opted not to have a ring bearer or prefer having the best man keep the rings safe until the ceremony.
The best man may also be asked to hold things like the groom’s cell phone or wallet, so it’s still close but doesn’t have .to be in his pocket constantly
Because the best man is typically a sibling or best friend of the groom, chances are he knows most of the guests in attendance.
With so many connections, he is the perfect candidate to help welcome guests to the wedding ceremony.
Serve as a Witness
Typically, a couple needs two witnesses as they sign their marriage license, and often this duty is left up to the best man and the maid of honour.
The best man should be readily available for this task, watching as the couple signs their marriage license and penning his name as well if required.
Get Ready to Smile and Pose
Believe it or not, posing for photographers is a big part of your groomsmen responsibilities.
As a groomsman, you’ll be asked to be a part of the group photos before or after the ceremony.
Yes, some of the poses may be a little cheesy, but that’s all part of the fun. So be a good sport and play along for the sake of the newlyweds.
We promise the photos and memories will be worth it in the end.
Crush the Reception
First, the slightly less fun stuff—in general, be prepared to serve as an information centre and point person for any guests with questions (think: Do you know where the restroom is? Can you help me find my way to the cocktail hour balcony?).
At the reception, you’ll likely be introduced together with the bridesmaid you escorted down the aisle.
You may also be asked to dance with the groom’s grandmother, the bridesmaids, a lonely flower girl or other single guests throughout the night.
Just keep your eyes and ears open for opportunities to be helpful—otherwise, the night (and the bar) is yours to enjoy.
Kick Off the Toasts
If a couple opts to open up the floor for toasts, the best man is often the first to step in.
And because this toast may just be the most significant responsibility the best man has, it’s essential to put some thought into it ahead of time.
A well-crafted toast should be appropriate for the setting while celebrating the story of the newlyweds.
This will certainly depend on the wedding set-up, but the best man can play a valuable role in ensuring gifts get to the right place.
If there is a specific location, the couple would like gifts stored, and the best man needs to assist in collecting them, so guests don’t have to do much running around.
It’s also helpful to put the best man in charge of transporting gifts to the newlyweds’ home after the wedding.
Post-Wedding Groomsmen Duties
Stick Around and Help
Your groomsmen duties don’t end when the newlyweds leave the venue. So stick around and see if you can help clean up or break down.
The couple’s family may need a hand taking things to their cars or packing up items to bring to the hotel. So this thoughtful gesture will mean a lot.
Though the newlyweds may already be well on their way to their honeymoon, you can keep your groomsmen duties going by offering rides to the airport for the guests visiting from out of town.
Coordinate and Decorate the Getaway Car
The best man may be asked to help coordinate car transportation for the newlyweds to leave the reception.
And while they’re at it, the best man may enlist the help of the whole wedding party to help decorate the getaway car.
Return Your Formalwear
You may want to crash after the excitement of all the festivities, but don’t forget to return your tux.
Many suit rental companies have strict, next-day return policies. Forgetting to bring back your tux on time could result in late fees.
Set a reminder for yourself in advance so that you won’t have to worry about it.
This is especially important if the couple is leaving for their honeymoon right away.
The best man may step in to take care of the groom’s clothing after changing out of his wedding attire.
Along the way, he should also make sure any rented tuxes are returned on time (and intact).
Check-In With Vendors
Once the party comes to an end, the couple will be ready to whisk off into the night.
To allow that to happen without interruption, the best man is tasked with ensuring all wedding-related expenses are taken care of.
Typically, the vendors should have all been paid in full one month before the big day, but in the event, they haven’t been, it’s the best man who makes sure everything is settled before the night comes to a close.
If there are any payments to take care of, keeping them in clearly marked envelopes will make all the difference.
Send Off the Couple
As the night draws close, make sure the couple is appropriately sent off to the hotel or off to their honeymoon.
The groomsmen may also want to stick around to make sure all the vendors have been paid and any essential items (like gifts) have been collected.
Put Your Feet Up
You’ve officially completed all your groomsmen duties. Now it’s time to relax. Looking for a wedding photographer in Melbourne? Look no further. Brighton Savoy has compiled an ultimate list of Melbourne wedding photographers to help you choose.
Put your feet up and pat yourself on the pat for doing a job well done at your favourite couple’s wedding ceremony.