A second wedding gives you the opportunity to plan something a little different. To use the experience and knowledge you already have to create a celebration that truly reflects your unique journey as a couple. Whether you’re looking to make a bold statement or create an intimate gathering, there are countless ways to have an extraordinary second wedding.
Many couples getting married for the second time try to do things in a somewhat non-traditional style. Having gone through the process once before, planning things that are more personal and meaningful is often the main driver, rather than sticking to the classic forms of matrimony.
So whether you are standing on a deserted beach with just your partner, sailing from Seattle on a romantic cruise with your friends and family, or going all out with a huge celebration, here are some tips and ideas to help you plan a wedding that is as distinctive and special as your love story.
Choose a venue that speaks to you.
One of the first steps in planning your second wedding is selecting a venue that reflects your personal style and preferences. This often means steering away from the classic wedding venues and considering unconventional options such as a rustic barn, an art gallery, a beachside resort, or a rooftop garden. By thinking outside the box and choosing a location that resonates with you as a couple, you can set the tone for a memorable celebration.
Wear something non-traditional
A second wedding is a great opportunity to embrace your individuality and opt for some form of non-traditional wedding attire that reflects your personal style. Whether you decide to just add a few unusual and sentimental details to an otherwise classic outfit or go completely alternative, it is a great opportunity to choose something that represents something meaningful to you both as a couple.
Include your kids in the ceremony.
If you or your partner have children from previous relationships, why not think about involving them in the ceremony? This can be a beautiful way to symbolize the blending of your families and help them feel part of your big day.
Write your own vows.
Many couples choose to write their own vows these days regardless of whether they are getting married for the first time or not, but a second wedding really is the perfect opportunity for a more personal touch in your vows. Writing your own vows allows you to express your love, commitment, and shared experiences in a way that is unique to you both as a partnership, by sharing heartfelt stories, promises, and aspirations for your future together. Customized vows add a deeply personal touch to your wedding ceremony and create a lasting memory for both you and your guests.
Skip the wedding cake.
Wedding cakes are fun, but there are plenty of other great options for the sweet course, and a second wedding is a great chance to pick a dessert you really want to eat, rather than sticking with tradition. Consider a cheese ‘wedding cake’, a dessert bar, a selection of gourmet cupcakes, or even an ice cream truck! Choose something that reflects your tastes and preferences as a couple, and let your guests indulge in a sweet delight that they will remember.
Choose a theme that fits your hobbies and interests
Your wedding should be a reflection of your shared passions and interests, so use the theme widely to create a day that’s truly yours. By incorporating elements that represent your hobbies, you can add a layer of authenticity and make it a true celebration of your unique love story.
Why is a Second wedding better than the First?
- Experience: By the time you’re planning a second wedding, you’ve likely learned a lot from your first. You know what you liked and what you would do differently. This wisdom can lead to more informed decisions and a smoother planning process.
- Less Pressure: There can be a lot of pressure, both societal and self-imposed, around first weddings to uphold certain traditions or to make the day “perfect.” In a second wedding, you might feel more comfortable breaking away from tradition and focusing more on what truly makes you and your partner happy.
- Personal Growth: People change and grow over time. A second wedding often reflects a different stage in life, and the celebration can feel more authentic to who you are now.
- More Intimate: Second weddings are often smaller and more intimate, which can make them feel more personal and meaningful. You’re likely to spend less time worrying about impressing a large guest list and more time celebrating with your closest friends and family.
- Financial Considerations: Having been through the process before, you might have a clearer idea of where you want to splurge and where you want to save. You might also have more resources than you did the first time around, which can help reduce financial stress.
- Inclusion of Children: If you or your partner have children from a previous relationship, a second wedding can be a beautiful opportunity to celebrate not just your union, but the blending of your families.
- Focus on What Matters: Often, second weddings are more focused on the marriage itself—the commitment being made—rather than the pomp and circumstance of the wedding day. This shift in focus can lead to a deeper appreciation of the significance of the event.
- Creative Freedom: Second weddings often feel less bound by tradition, giving you the freedom to get creative, break the rules, and do things your own way.
Remember, the value of a wedding doesn’t come from whether it’s the first, second, or third. It comes from the love between the couple, the joy of the celebration, and the commitment being made. Each wedding, like each love story, is unique and beautiful in its own way.
Here is a summary of some tips on how to have the best non-traditional second wedding:
- Personalize Your Ceremony: Make the ceremony truly about you and your partner. Incorporate your own vows, choose readings that resonate with you, or even create a unique ritual that signifies your union. This could include a unity sand ceremony, a handfasting ritual, or a wine-box ceremony.
- Choose a Unique Venue: Instead of a traditional church or event hall, consider getting married in a place that holds special meaning for you both. This could be a beach, a forest, your backyard, a museum, a library, a vineyard, or even your favorite restaurant.
- Creative Attire: Feel free to break away from the traditional wedding dress and tuxedo. Wear something that truly reflects your personal style. This could be a colorful dress, a vintage suit, or even casual wear if it fits your wedding theme.
- Non-traditional Invitations: You can also get creative with your wedding invitations. You could use a video invitation, a personalized song, or even a handwritten letter for each guest.
- Redefine the Reception: Instead of a formal seated dinner, consider a more relaxed and interactive style of reception. This could be a buffet, a food truck, a barbecue, or even a picnic. You could also opt for non-traditional entertainment such as a live band, a magician, or a stand-up comedian.
- Cakes and Sweets: Instead of the traditional tiered wedding cake, consider alternatives like a dessert bar, doughnut wall, or a selection of your favorite pies.
- Gifts and Favors: Instead of traditional wedding favors, consider more personalized or useful options. This could be a donation to a charity of your choice in the name of your guests, a small plant for each guest to grow, or even personalized mementos that reflect your shared interests.
- Photography and Videography: Consider hiring a photographer and videographer who specialize in candid, documentary-style coverage rather than traditional posed wedding photos. This can help capture the unique, authentic moments of your celebration.
- Include Your Loved Ones: If you or your partner have children from previous relationships, find ways to include them in the ceremony. This could be through special roles, like being a ring bearer or flower girl, or through a unity ceremony that symbolically brings the new family together.
- Keep it Intimate: Consider having a smaller guest list. It can make your wedding feel more personal and gives you the opportunity to spend quality time with each of your guests.
Remember, the most important thing is that your wedding reflects the love between you and your partner. Don’t feel pressured to stick to any traditions that don’t resonate with you. This is your special day, and you should celebrate it in a way that makes you both happy.