As the new millennium progresses, we observe that outdated wedding customs disappear and are replaced by more contemporary ones. For example, the bride's family is no longer required to foot the cash, grooms aren't requesting permission from their girlfriends' parents before popping the question, and changing the colour of your white wedding dress is certainly an option.
One pattern we notice becoming more frequent has to do with the actual proposal: more couples are choosing to ring shopping together rather than keeping the design a surprise.
It seems that more and more women are participating in the engagement ring selection process, both literally and figuratively.
Couples are choosing to ring shop together, and some ladies even go so far as sharing the cost (sharing the cost of the ring) by informing a friend or making hints to their significant other about the particular ring they desire.
So, should you choose your engagement ring yourself or not? What do you think, future brides? First, let's consider the benefits and drawbacks.
Can A Woman Choose Her Engagement Ring?
Historically, the groom would choose the ring his bride would wear on her finger. The engagement ring will be a surprise to the bride until after the proposal.
However, modern feminists have made it common for women to select engagement rings. Should it be the case, though?
Does it take anything special about proposing to a lady when she gets to pick out her engagement ring?
As women become more physically and symbolically involved in the engagement ring/proposal scenario, most men are left wondering if this should be the new standard.
So, Can A Woman Pick Their Engagement Ring?
A lady has every right to select her engagement ring. But, traditionally, males have picked out the perfect engagement ring (without the woman's input), planned a big surprise party to celebrate the engagement, and then proposed to the woman on one knee. Even while this is still done occasionally, customs like these are losing ground as society evolves.
If you're having trouble deciding on an engagement ring, consulting your significant other might not be a bad idea.
After all, it's not always wise to make a choice unilaterally without asking the woman, especially if the ring you choose isn't what she wants.
The engagement ring you choose will last a lifetime if your relationship lasts or if she says yes; therefore, it's important to involve the woman or get her opinion even if you're not spending much money.
Pros Of Shopping Together
The Ring Is Exactly What You Want.
It would be best if you liked the ring because you'll be wearing it for a long time. There are countless ring styles to choose from, and it's common to be disappointed after seeing a band you liked online in person. Together, you'll be able to try on a wide variety of diamond ring styles and settings to choose the perfect one for you. In this way, when he finally does pop the question, you'll already be sporting an engagement ring you adore.
It Will Take Pressure Off Your Future Fiance
Because of the financial commitment, your fiancé will want to ensure the engagement ring is perfect for you. Helping your future husband feel at ease while searching for the perfect diamond engagement ring will help him enjoy the process more fully. Shopping for the "perfect" ring can be stressful, but going alongside a friend can alleviate a lot of the pressure.
Making A Big Decision Together.
A diamond engagement ring is likely one of the most significant financial commitments a young couple will ever make to one another. Since marriage is about making compromises and collaborative decisions, selecting an engagement ring together is the perfect opportunity to comprehend the cooperation essential for future decision-making.
It Can Serve As A Bonding Experience.
Choosing and designing the engagement ring together is a wonderful way to bond as a couple and create a lasting memento of your time together. In addition, both you and your potential spouse can benefit from learning more about one another's preferences and interests.
Cons Of Shopping Together
The Proposal Will Lack The Surprise Factor.
Adding an element of surprise can make for an emotional, unforgettable experience, elevating the level of romanticism. Selecting your engagement ring could take away from the magic of being proposed to. By selecting your ring, you'll have a concrete mental image of it and a growing expectation that the proposal is imminent.
The Ring You Want Is Out Of His Budget.
You've narrowed it down to the ring of your dreams, but it's out of his price range. It's possible that you and your partner will feel awkward and disappointed in this situation.
You Know How Much He Spent.
It's true that most people avoid talking about money and finances. However, you will be in an awkward situation if you go engagement ring shopping with your potential fiancé because you will be aware of the amount he is spending.
The Process May Seem Less Personal.
Nevertheless, the time and thought that went into the present are a big part of its allure, as with most presents. It's possible that the ring your future husband picks for you won't be the ring of your dreams, but the fact that he took the time to find it for you will make it more special.
Ways To Pick The Perfect Wedding Ring
Narrow Down Your Wedding Ring Choices
Don't freak out if the prospect of choosing between diamonds and gemstones or platinum and gold for an engagement ring seems insurmountable. Just focus on each step. Launch in fashion: How elaborate of a band do you have in mind? Is your wedding ring important to match your engagement ring in terms of metal? Should you and your significant other wear matching rings? Before going shopping, it's a good idea to answer questions like these to help narrow your focus.
Consider Buying Your Ring And Your Bands Together
Knowing what bands go with the engagement ring can help you make a decision, but if you wish to be shocked by the engagement ring, this may not work. For instance, if you have a special engagement ring, you could choose a straightforward band, whereas a straightforward engagement ring can call for the extra sparkle of a diamond pavé band.
Consider how the rings fit together as well. For example, if you want to wear your wedding and engagement rings together all the time, look for a contour or shadow band that fits snugly around the matching engagement ring.
If you intend to wear your wedding band by itself, you could prefer a more elaborate design that complements your engagement ring and wedding band. Find a band that complements your ring by consulting with your jeweller (some can even create both simultaneously).
Start Your Ring Search Early
When you've settled on a rough style for your dream ring, it's time for the exciting part: trying them on! If possible, ring shopping at least a few months before the wedding. You'll want some time to look around, compare costs, and come back to rings that particularly caught your eye.
You should certainly add more time to the process if you have your heart set on a personalised ring. However, remember that additional services like engraving can add up to a month to the delivery time.
Mix It Up
Don't stress if your partner prefers yellow gold and you prefer platinum. You are not restricted to purchasing items of the same metal or design. Choosing wedding bands that reflect your styles is the key to finding something you both adore. Braided bands that blend the two metals are one way to strike a compromise.
Set A Budget
When purchasing rings, spend roughly 3% of your wedding budget on them. A conventional, 14-karat gold or straightforward platinum band may cost roughly $1,000, depending on the shop.
If you intend to customise your rings with any of these extras, like diamonds or engraving, keep in mind that the price may rise quickly. The cost of engraving is often determined by the number of characters, the typeface used, and whether it is done manually or mechanically.
Keep Your Lifestyle In Mind
Keep in mind that you will be wearing this band daily, so it should be something that fits in with your lifestyle without drawing attention to itself. For example, playing sports or an instrument may necessitate a ring with softer, more rounded edges.
If you do manual labour, it's probably best to find a plain, solid metal ring without carvings or gemstones, as they could become loose and cause accidents. On the other hand, highly resistant platinum is the best choice if you lead a busy lifestyle since when it is scratched, the metal is only shifted rather than completely removed.
Try Something Different
Even if you have your heart set on a braided rose gold ring or a diamond eternity band, it's a good idea to branch out and try on some different styles once you get to the jewellery store. Talk to the jeweller and let them make recommendations based on your likes and dislikes; don't limit their options.
It's possible to find your ideal wedding dress in an unexpected place. Try it out by walking about the store with it on, and if you have time, try writing and messaging while you have it on.
Think Long Term
Don't be hesitant to experiment with new looks, but make sure they're ones you'll still love 40 years from now. Don't worry too much about it because you can always customise the ring. To further emphasise the significance of the anniversary, you may always add diamonds or upgrade the metal to platinum.
Consider The Maintenance
Washing and soaking a wedding band with stones in warm, sudsy water, then gently brushing it with a soft toothbrush or eyebrow brush (too much pressure might remove the stones from their setting), rinsing it, and patting it dry with a soft lint-free cloth will keep it clean and shiny.
Sounds like a lot of work, right? A gold or platinum ring won't require much maintenance beyond the occasional polishing with a soft, lint-free cloth.
Size It Right
You often don't take your wedding bands off when your fingers expand and contract due to heat, cold, water retention, or weight gain. Instead, wear them during summers, winters, exercise, and pregnancy.
Plan your final ring fitting when you're calm and your body temperature is normal to determine the size that will best withstand those fluctuations.
Therefore, you ought to avoid finalising first thing in the morning. In addition, you retain water from the previous night immediately after working out, and your fingers enlarge in extreme heat or cold, which can cause your hands to swell and contract.
Check For Quality
Not only your wedding bands but all rings are subject to quality monitoring. A manufacturer's trademark (which demonstrates that they stand behind their work) and a quality mark, such as 24Kor PLAT, should both be visible inside the band of the ring (this proves the metal quality is what the retailer says is).
Thus, while choosing a diamond engagement ring, you should ensure that it satisfies the 4Cs requirements for the cut, colour, carat, and clarity.
Because a lady can choose her engagement ring, purchasing one on her own isn't necessarily a bad idea, but only if you are certain of the style they will choose.
You must keep in mind that while you are free to use the assistance of your wife in your hunt for the ideal engagement ring, choosing the ideal ring and shocking her out of the blue will give you significant brownie points.
When you pick out the greatest engagement ring, have a spectacular proposal, or even a more private kind of proposal but still go all out because you are confident she will appreciate it, you come out as an extremely romantic spouse.
The engagement ring and the proposal frequently end up being a highly special gesture when the man selects the ideal ring on his own, without the bride's input or assistance.
These days, it's typical to see women expressing their desire for a specific engagement ring by shopping with their significant other or by dropping hints.
And we're all in agreement that this is perfectly OK. Some ladies will also split the cost of the engagement ring in half by sharing the cost during the engagement ring shopping process.
Here are some reasons it is a good idea for couples to go engagement ring shopping together.
Is It Bad Luck To Pick Your Engagement Ring?
While picking out your engagement ring gives you the opportunity to express yourself, connect with your partner, and get to know them better, some people (the superstitious) think it might not be the best move because it could bring bad luck to your relationship even before you begin your life together.
But if you're not superstitious, this doesn't seem like something you need to be concerned about.
Financial Rules Of Thumb—Who Pays? How Much Is Too Much?
Not too long ago, the groom would have been the one to cover the cost of the engagement ring. Long live dating customs. Nowadays, it's much more typical and different for both parties to contribute to the cost of the engagement ring. This won't detract from the interaction; it frequently results in a more satisfying and thoughtful purchasing experience.
In terms of cost, a diamond engagement ring typically runs around $6,000. The prefered style, cut, and quality of the diamonds or stones will determine the final cost. Just keep in mind to choose a ring within your means so you can begin your new life together stress-free. To guarantee that your ring is within your budget, starting by selecting a lab-grown diamond is a terrific idea.
They believe it is a matter of personal preference whether or not two people go shopping together. The engagement ring plays a significant role for some couples. The engagement ring may not be a huge deal for some people. There is no correct or incorrect response. Simply put, it's what you and your significant other feel are right. The most crucial thing is that you both agree on your course of action and are content and at ease with it because this ring will symbolise the start of your new life together.
FAQs About Wedding
Over this, even when your spouse pops the question, you will already have a ring in mind that you like donning and will be ready to show it off.
The stress alleviated as a result of this will be appreciated by the person who will one day become your husband. Your soon-to-be spouse will want to ensure that you are entirely content with the ring before purchasing it because an engagement ring is a substantial financial commitment.